ghorio
Free Rider
Butiki ni Ghorio...
Posts: 397
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Post by ghorio on Feb 29, 2008 10:20:12 GMT 8
1. Trulalu. 2. eklavu 3. eklavu. 4. trulalu 5. eklavu 6. trulalu 7. trulalu. 8. eklavu 9. trulalu 10. trulalu
-batang beki nagsasagot ng true or false na quiz. (gay child answering a "true or false" quiz)
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ghorio
Free Rider
Butiki ni Ghorio...
Posts: 397
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Post by ghorio on Feb 29, 2008 10:21:32 GMT 8
A boss confused about his Math asked his secretary:
If I give you P3M less 17%, how much would you take off?
SECRETARY: everything sir! Dress, bra, panty!
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ATO
Bike Commuter
"In Mountain Biking, There's No Destination; Just a Bike, A Rider and A Place To Ride"
Posts: 59
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Post by ATO on Feb 29, 2008 10:43:06 GMT 8
A guy walks in and asks the bartender, “Isn’t that Bush and Powell sitting over there?” The bartender says, “Yep, that’s them.” So the guy walks over and says, “Wow, this is a real honor. What are you guys doing in here?”Bush says, “We’re planning WWIII. And the guy says, “Really? What’s going to happen?”
Bush says, “Well, we’re going to kill 140 million Iraqis this time and one bicycle repairman.”
The guy exclaimed, “A bicycle repairman!!! Why kill a bicycle repairman?”
Bush turns to Powell, punches him on the shoulder and says, “See, dummy! I told you no one would worry about the 140 million Iraqis!”
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Post by ice on Feb 29, 2008 18:29:10 GMT 8
the "funniest harharhar its so funny i forgot to laugh" text message i received a minute ago from my office mate dennis.. " dude! good news! mali-lift ang color coding sa makati!.... mamayang 7pm!" grrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!! he...he...he... curahee!
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Post by alitaptap on Mar 3, 2008 1:28:02 GMT 8
One morning in a Sociology class:
Prof: Class, who among you had an experience having sex with a ghost?
Pedro raised his hand..
Prof: Do you mind telling us your experience having sex with a ghost?
Pedro: Oh, I thought you said goats.
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Post by ice on Mar 17, 2008 12:27:55 GMT 8
juan: dude, i feel like puking, but i can't pedro: that's easy, stick your finger up your throat (sticks his finger down his throat) juan: i still can't puke pedro: then try to stick your finger up our ass. (sticks his finger up his ass) juan: i still can't puke pedro: now, stick your finger down your throat again curahee!
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Ti-bar
XC Rider
dont be alarmed at the avatar, i didnt get it from mtbiking!
Posts: 136
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Post by Ti-bar on Mar 23, 2008 0:40:27 GMT 8
BOY: Wala akong kwentang anak para sa inyo! Lahat ng ginagawa ko puro mali ! Lagi nalang ako mali !!! Di 'nyo na ako mahal! AMA: dehins totoo yan, Nagkakamali ka anak. BOY: Shet! Mali na naman ako!!!
trans:
BOY: Im a good-for- nothing son to you! for you, i am always wrong!!! you dont love me anymore!!! AMA: Thats not true, you are wrong my son. BOY: Shet! Im wrong again!!!
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Ti-bar
XC Rider
dont be alarmed at the avatar, i didnt get it from mtbiking!
Posts: 136
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Post by Ti-bar on Mar 23, 2008 0:41:50 GMT 8
FROG: what does my future hold? FAIRY: you'll meet someone who wants to know everything about you. FROG: great! Will I meet her in a party? FAIRY: no. in biology class
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Ti-bar
XC Rider
dont be alarmed at the avatar, i didnt get it from mtbiking!
Posts: 136
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Post by Ti-bar on Mar 23, 2008 0:48:32 GMT 8
DOC: umubo ka! PEDRO: ubo! ubo! ubo! DOC: ubo pa! PEDRO: ubo! ubo! ubo!...ubo! ubo! ubo! DOC: okay. PEDRO: ano po ba sakit ko doc? DOC: may ubo ka.
trans:
DOC: can you cough! PEDRO: cough!cough! cough! DOC: cough some more PEDRO: cough!cough! cough!...cough!cough! cough! DOC: okay. PEDRO: whats wrong with me doc? DOC: you have a cough!
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Ti-bar
XC Rider
dont be alarmed at the avatar, i didnt get it from mtbiking!
Posts: 136
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Post by Ti-bar on Mar 23, 2008 0:51:54 GMT 8
Kung nag GAY LANGUAGE sana sila GMA at GARCI eh di walang SCAM! (if only GMA and Garci used Gay Language there wouldnt had been a scam GMA: hallow gracia! GARCI: uy mother ever! Na chenilyn de kimberlyn ko na po yung mga chuva ek ek. GMA: bonggacious! Eh yung mga chenes chenes, carry na ba? GARCI: flatshoes! Winnie santos mama, wiz na wori eclavou na ever! Na chorva na! GMA: ang tarushki! Maldita ka talaga vruha ka! Eh di windra na naman watashi?! GARCI: anufi ate. GMA: oshah ba.
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Ti-bar
XC Rider
dont be alarmed at the avatar, i didnt get it from mtbiking!
Posts: 136
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Post by Ti-bar on Mar 23, 2008 1:05:54 GMT 8
ERAP JOKES Sinoli ni Erap ang libro sa library. ERAP: sobrang dami ng characters wala naman storya. LIBRARIAN: kayo pala kumuha ng telephone directory namin! trans: when Erap returns a book to the library ERAP: theres too many characters yet no story. LIBRARIAN: oh, so youre the one who took our telephone directory! When Erap was under detention- nagbubungkal ng lupa si Erap para magtanim. Akala ng nakakita niloloko lang siya dahil wala naman siyang tinatanim. BANTAY: sir, wala naman kayong tinatanim ah. ERAP: bobo! Seedless to!! when Erap was digging to plant, the one whos witnessing thought he was only being "taken for a ride" because theres nothing being planted, Guard: sir, you are not planting anything there. Erap: Dumb! this is seedless!!
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Post by g.b.b on Mar 23, 2008 1:39:58 GMT 8
Thomas applied as security guard.......
PERSONNEL: What we're looking for are the one who always have suspicious mind, highly alert, insistent personality, unusual sense of hearing with a killer instict..... Do you think you're qualified?
THOMAS: I don't think i am..... Puede po ba yung Misis ko na lang? ;D
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Post by rocky on Mar 23, 2008 7:05:54 GMT 8
This is no joke...tibbar. This actually happened last March 14. But it is...OT. I was sitted around the table together with Erap at Manila Diamond Hotel's grand ballroom. Erap exhales..."Waiter...sa ngang Scotch." Waiter came back hurriedly and laid on table fronting Erap Scott table napkins. Erap snorts..."Ano yan? Yung Scotch Blue." Since everybody had double shots too many on an open bar, that faux pas by the waiter transformed the presidential table to more of tagayan sa canto.
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Post by minotaur on Mar 24, 2008 9:45:36 GMT 8
<Forwarded Msg>
As proposeed by GMA, sex will now be taxed. 1. Upon penetration, (V@gin@l Access Tax) 2. If more than 10 minutes inside, (Burial Tax) 3. Upon withdrawal, (Exit Tax) 4. Those who don't have sex life, (Idle Asset Tax) 5. Those who practice withdrawal method of birth control, (Withholding Tax) 6. Entering other than wife, (Road Users Tax)
Kung matutuloy ito, syo pa lang makakaahon na ang Pilipinas sa lahat ng utang.
Mabuhay ka!
(Trans: if this pushed through, you'd be our saviour... )
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Ti-bar
XC Rider
dont be alarmed at the avatar, i didnt get it from mtbiking!
Posts: 136
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Post by Ti-bar on Apr 5, 2008 23:40:59 GMT 8
Inspirational Quotes: Lahat ng problema, may solusyon. Kapag walang solusyon, wag mo ng problemahin. Lagi mong tandaan, kung kaya ng iba, ipagawa mo sa kanila. wag pilitin ang sarili, make life easy. dehins lahat ng guapo may girlfriend, ang iba sa kanila may boyfriend. Trans: All problems have solutions, If theres no solution, dont be problematic about it, always remember if others can do it, have them do it. Dont force yourself, make life easy... not all handsome have girlfriends, some of them have boyfriends.
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Post by ice on Jun 10, 2008 16:17:19 GMT 8
knock knock! whose's there?! itlog (trans: egg), beef, pork, liver! itlog (trans: egg), beef, pork, liver who?! ladies, and gentlmen, mr. nat king cole! "... when i fall in love, itlog (trans: egg) beef pork liver.........." harharhar! ;D currahee!
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asto
Bike Commuter
certified bike commuter
Posts: 69
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Post by asto on Jun 11, 2008 14:44:21 GMT 8
got this one. .....hon last text ko 2 sayo, load mo ako o kaya pasaload mo ako ng 150 may sasabihen ako sayo emportanti. from text scammer!
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Post by g.b.b on Jun 14, 2008 18:58:47 GMT 8
ngongo and wife are "making love"
ngongo: hon, mukha mo mapute....
wife: huh?!? di naman ah....
ngongo: mukha mo mapute..
wife: dehins sinabi maputi e...
ngongo: (raising his voice) ang abi ko!!! mukha mo mapute!!!!
(anak nagising)
Anak: Ma, sabi ni papa.... IBUKA MO MABUTI! Naman...istorbo....
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Post by g.b.b on Jun 14, 2008 19:00:48 GMT 8
woman with sick baby went to a clinic.
Doc: is he bottlefed?
Woman: brestfed po doc..
Doc starts squeezing womans nipples...
Doc: that's why he's sick. you're not producing milk...
Woman: YAYA LANG PO AKO DOC, YAYA!!
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Post by tantantini on Jun 18, 2008 16:54:57 GMT 8
wrong lyrics: "So kiss me and smaffle me...." "Nothings gonna change my love for you, you know naman by now how much I love you...." "Don't go Jason waterfalls...." just to add: I decided long ago, never to walk with edu manzano!
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