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Post by coilerblue on Jul 14, 2007 15:19:15 GMT 8
Change your specs, try 30-something lonely women, waiting for the last trip , hehehe even their parents will push you. how about a 40 year old gal and her parents will give her with special discount hehehe joke
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Post by enzo on Jul 14, 2007 16:08:33 GMT 8
But Jaymz, My answer is yes and no ;D ;D ;D Wandie, YES and NO! ;D Im waiting for your info so I can apply it in case I go into that situation or scenario. Maybe you are the one who will be educating us in the end. duwag kasi ako pagdating sa mga ganyan na magtatapat ng tunay na nararamdaman and the reason why i chose to date that particular girl, to admit, im scared when it comes to rejection (aka takot mabasted) and i dont know why kaya ang conclusion we end up as friends. Ill share my situation that happened to me way back in 2005 I have this officemate of mind who is still my friend until now. We met Sep 2004 in the office and at first friends friends lang kami (e.g hi, hello). When we changed our workshifts nagkataon na magkasabay na kami ng shift, thats from dec 2004 to may of 2005. we started as friends then beso, then pa-sweet-sweet, and joke around since we sit beside each other and we constantly text each other after work and during rest days. nung mga may of 2005 na i started to fall for her already and sobrang di ko na xa maalis sa utak ko. i actually dated her twice, it was her birthday on august and i had a dozen roses delivered to her place. dun na nagstart na mgkaroon ng ilangan between us bec of that roses, according to her ang tingin lang nya sa kin as kuya since she is 5 years younger than me but matured. im guilty of that bec it either binigla ko xa or nag-expect ako na that she likes me the same as i do. that started my trauma. I dont know why i always expect. Anyway im not in a hurry right now to wait for ms. right, im just curious as well if there are bikers also who experiences the same scenario. I hope you guys understand my story. Wandie, Now were going somewhere, I admire your honesty and courage for opening up. It looks to me as just like all kind of girl, boy spending or being close to each other becoz of work, school or a neighbor. That's normal. I used to be like you and you seems to be a sincere guy. I wont suggest anything for now to complicate things. I will leave you on the hands of our of reliable expert in the house. You will never go wrong with them. BTW, dont feel bad with all the replies here, We are here to help you, I hope ;D Experts in the house or peeps with good intentions and suggestions are, Gadgets, WCoastbo, Alphabolt, Allegra, Lamok, Oi! Nelson, Exudes condidence and sexyness? HAHAHA! Fell of my chair ;D ;D ;D You always do it right.
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Post by enzo on Jul 14, 2007 18:10:21 GMT 8
hmmmm...interesting thread here. 2 pages already... @tofi, where exactly is dream boy? Bike Shop ba? ;D ;D Wandie When around girls just be yourself...look at what it did to me, I ended up with boys. Hahaha. Seriously, be a gentleman un lang and mean it. Spot on Meyrick, works for me all the time
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Post by kulot_salot on Jul 14, 2007 18:26:09 GMT 8
Experts in the house or peeps with good intentions and suggestions are, Gadgets, WCoastbo, Alphabolt, Allegra, Lamok, Oi! Nelson, Exudes condidence and sexyness? HAHAHA! Fell of my chair ;D ;D ;D what?!?! like i do not have good intention!?!?!?! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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Post by nhan on Jul 14, 2007 18:32:44 GMT 8
Watch American Pie 1.... the scene where i think scott is in the car with the college chick and trying to impress her... watch it for you to find out what the girl said and may help you afterwards ;D kulot_salot... hahahaha ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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Post by enzo on Jul 14, 2007 18:53:14 GMT 8
Experts in the house or peeps with good intentions and suggestions are, Gadgets, WCoastbo, Alphabolt, Allegra, Lamok, Oi! Nelson, Exudes condidence and sexyness? HAHAHA! Fell of my chair ;D ;D ;D what?!?! like i do not have good intention!?!?!?! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D Sorry Jayms, Guys, What I meant is, Matured guys who suggests, AHHHH! you know what I mean! Guys who took time to write long meaningful posts. Not that your posts is not meaningful, Its actually highly informative, But, experience counts here and we have to admit that they are highly experienced peeps ;D ;D ;D O wag ka ng magalit. They will be angrier with me for calling them matured(Old) ;D ;D ;D Lets Just help Wandie. I have a Friend here with the same problem, Gave her a Russian girl, the next day his smile was mile wide and said "Thanks brad! that was all I need" But wandie is different, I hope
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Post by yukon on Jul 14, 2007 19:09:00 GMT 8
hmmmm...interesting thread here. 2 pages already... @tofi, where exactly is dream boy? Bike Shop ba? ;D ;D Wandie When around girls just be yourself...look at what it did to me, I ended up with boys. Hahaha. Seriously, be a gentleman un lang and mean it. Spot on Meyrick, works for me all the time enzohihihihihi ;D ;D ;D ;D you i gotta meet in person. Mamati has lots of kwento bout you (ay OT) sorry Tofi, where is Dream Girl...boy pala??? hey 3 pages!!! wohohooo lock the thread (ay mali)
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Post by enzo on Jul 14, 2007 19:27:57 GMT 8
Spot on Meyrick, works for me all the time enzohihihihihi ;D ;D ;D ;D you i gotta meet in person. Mamati has lots of kwento bout you (ay OT) sorry Tofi, where is Dream Girl...boy pala??? hey 3 pages!!! wohohooo lock the thread (ay mali) Meyrick, Dont believe her I just stay as true to myself and the people around me, Being a gentleman, helpful and always around. That's why they are capitalizing on it. Kahit na abusuhin pa nila ako, I will still help and be there for them. Shrug off that Myth about me as what Mamati told you. Being around girls doesnt mean Im always getting the deal or having it all. Alam mo na, playboy daw pero wala namang syota ;D ;D ;D Girls got so confident and at ease with me they tell me their deepest secrets and EVERYTHING. So at ease it got me in trouble lots of times Even as of this writing, if one of my lady friends will read this, they will say " with Enzo, I dont care what people say of me or us coz he is just so good as a person nobody will think bad or evil of it" That my friend is what you must try to learn. But not as a passport to do bad things or go left. After all, this is a small world, I dont want a friend of a friend of a friend of my wife sees me. But just in case.
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Post by enzo on Jul 14, 2007 19:58:36 GMT 8
OK. You're a completely balanced individual, have true inner happiness and living the fulfilled single life. Is there more one could ask for? Perhaps being with someone that "gets" you and can finish your sentences. Someone that likes you for who you are. marcs makes a great point about repeating the same mistakes. If you keep bumping into the same wall, then change direction. Try something new. If you're only dating women that work with you, try meeting them at church related functions. Get yourself invited to weddings, parties or any place where a friend can introduce you to a potential date. Anywhere, but work. Although, it doesn't sound like you're having problems meeting women. It sounds like the ones you are meeting not at the same stage in life as you are. It's very possible that many of the women you meet think of you as potential marriage material, but they're not ready for anything permanent. It's now a matter of meeting the right person. I hate to say it, but it's a numbers game. The more women you meet, the better chance you have of finding someone compatible. Life is short, right? You can't waste too much time with Ms. Wrong For You, if Ms. Right is waiting to be discovered. Maybe everyone can give you advice on the search. Spending weeks and months courting someone that's not truly interested can only bring heart ache. Is there anyway to help you know if they have the same feelings as you do? Here's the start of the list... 1) When you first meet someone it's chit chat time. Ask them a few generic ice breaker questions. If the conversation goes well and they also ask about you, it's a very good start. If the conversation is one sided and you're asking all the questions, then it's a good sign she not too interested. Move on, there's no chemistry. 2) You've gone on several dates now and the conversations usually center on popular culture, work related happenings and items that were on the evening news or newspaper (politics & religion). You've asked several personal questions (nothing too personal), but she always turns the conversation away from her inner thoughts and feelings. Not wanting you to get too close. Possible red flag? 3) You've been dating several weeks now, but you still haven't met any of her friends. She's ok with joining you and your friends on outings, but you get the feeling she doesn't want her friends to meet you. Possible red flag? 4) Her favorite conversation topic is her ex boyfriend. Definite red flag! 5) The effort put into the relationship is one sided. You're doing all the work and your efforts are not reciprocated. anyone else have their own red flag warnings of when to bail out before investing too much emotional energy? BTW this is a two way street. If guys exhibit these same warnings... be wary girls. Wcoastbo, Plain and simple but very much right. Wandie. Jot down this also.
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Post by yukon on Jul 14, 2007 20:11:46 GMT 8
Enzo What Thelma mentioned about you is you know your bikes and well versed with bike thingies. Its a job we here at PinoyMTBiker would like to have...me specially. ;D and you're accomodating too. Hope to ride with you some day! Wandie So I guess you have tons of tips already from the veterans and newbies. Time to put them to work ...properly
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Post by enzo on Jul 14, 2007 20:34:53 GMT 8
Enzo What Thelma mentioned about you is you know your bikes and well versed with bike thingies. Its a job we here at PinoyMTBiker would like to have...me specially. ;D and you're accomodating too. Hope to ride with you some day! Wandie So I guess you have tons of tips already from the veterans and newbies. Time to put them to work ...properly Meyrick, Our time will come, Dying to meet and ride with you guys also. Im contemplating of leaving my job and go home and just ride as often as I can. Kasalanan ito ng PinoyMTBiker( PinoyMTBiker's fault) All day drooling at the trails gallery
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Post by yukon on Jul 14, 2007 20:37:16 GMT 8
ENZO
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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Post by allegra on Jul 14, 2007 20:58:17 GMT 8
Wow, I'm really flattered to learn i'm sexy and I've got good intentions as well haha Kaso the only reason I guess i'm being mentioned is because I'm old Gadgets and Enzo , I think I 'm beginning to fall for you guys. Galing! All my life I've lived sa bundok , i rarely see any females so I doubt I can help But when puro puno at unggoy nakikita mo sa paligid , feeling mo your so fogi I'm not romantic or thoughtful , i hate paying for anything , I'm not a gentleman either But i'm not afraid of rejection , my face is as thick as my skull More importantly , I can sometimes be funny wag lang may toyo and funny guys will rule the earth!! Dont be so seryoso and dont tell her your sad stories unless plano mo umutang or you need a big favor and stop the pagtatapat ng feelings BS kaya ka mababasted , kasi nagtatapat ka In short , keep her guessing , who gives a @#$% what she thinks sorry cant think of anything else for for now Pahinga muna ako , sumasakit arthritis ko
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Post by enzo on Jul 14, 2007 21:25:38 GMT 8
Wow, I'm really flattered to learn i'm sexy and I've got good intentions as well haha Kaso the only reason I guess i'm being mentioned is because I'm old Gadgets and Enzo , I think I 'm beginning to fall for you guys. Galing! All my life I've lived sa bundok , i rarely see any females so I doubt I can help But when puro puno at unggoy nakikita mo sa paligid , feeling mo your so fogi I'm not romantic or thoughtful , i hate paying for anything , I'm not a gentleman either But i'm not afraid of rejection , my face is as thick as my skull More importantly , I can be funny wag lang may toyo and funny guys will rule!! Dont be so seryoso and dont tell her your sad stories unless plano mo umutang or you need a big favor and stop the pagtatapat ng feelings BS kaya ka mababasted , kasi nagtatapat ka In short , keep her guessing , who gives a @#$% what she thinks sorry cant think of anything else for for now Pahinga muna ako , sumasakit arthritis ko Allegra, One of the things ladies love, sense of humor ;D ;D ;D Mas magaling ka! Kinabagan ako katatawa! ;D ;D ;DTrans= Very,very funny!
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Post by mhelai on Jul 15, 2007 22:20:59 GMT 8
single since birth... hmmm... there's nothing wrong with that...
just wanna share this to you... i know someone who have different problem naman...
actually this girl is always asking herself why until now she can't find the right man for her... there's
nothing wrong with her personality... she's pretty naman... but everytime she got into
relationship... just after a few months... she will run to her friends and cry on their shoulder
for being heartbroken again... sometimes she even asked herself... why she needs to be in a
relationship if it will not be a happy ending?...
why don't you try to comfort this girl? maybe you two will be a perfect partner... ahihihi!!! ;D
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Post by mhelai on Jul 15, 2007 22:39:15 GMT 8
But seriously, you know... just be patient and ask for our Lord's guidance in finding the right girl for you...
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Post by enzo on Jul 15, 2007 23:04:43 GMT 8
@wandie, Oh ayan! Now its coming from the ladies mouth na. Ladies, more help ls.
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Post by shuzzs on Jul 15, 2007 23:27:38 GMT 8
I was analyzing wandie's posts and I think what he wants to know is if what he felt or has experienced happened to any of us... Is that right, wandie?
Here's my share of the story... Actually I am a true TORPE guy during my teens. Well maybe because I am used being with boys (I have been to an all-boys school from prep until college)... There was even an event during my first year in HS... I was invited to a sophomore party. There, I was invited by some girls to dance. You know what my answers were... "later na lang. Kain muna ako" "saan ang kitchen, nauuhaw ako eh" (I really smile when I remember this... I really would like to bump my head) Eventually, I made it through the backdoor of the house and stayed outside until the party ended.
Anyway, moving forward... the first girl I wanted to court rejected me twice. The first one... she just said that she likes me as a friend. The second one... she told me... well actually her family told me that she is concentrating with her studies (I guess it was indirectly said). All the while I thought we were "ok".
Now came another girl during my 3rd year in college. I really liked this girl because of her simplicity, simple beauty, and for being mataray. This time, my courtship, seems to be on a different perspective mainly because I was rejected before. You may call it a pessimistic approach. All the while I was courting her, I was expecting to be rejected. However, as weeks went by, I began to fall for her. Until, I got a letter from her (during that time there were two of us who were courting her) telling me that she only liked me as her friend.
Ouch...
During that time, you may say that I too had the same feeling as yours... I don't want to court a girl because I feared that I might get rejected. Although, after 2 months, I had chanced upon the same (second) girl who just rejected me in an OJT training at a bank. At first, I tried not to cross paths with her but eventually I was assigned to an area (IT) just in front of her group (mock-up). To make the story short, eventually, we became friends. All the while, I was trying to please her... help her with her thesis... sometimes fetch her from school to take the ride home together, etc... and I never expected anything in return... If she would have told me to stop everything that I was doing for her, I would oblige and would have not complained. To end the story... she did accept me as her BF. Of course, that was after she broke up with her BF. This girl was my first and last GF... because she is now my wife.
A piece of advice... just live your life, brad, and take risks. Courting is just like taking risks. You will never know the outcome (good or bad) until you go for it.
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Post by gadgets88 on Jul 16, 2007 9:46:22 GMT 8
More importantly , I can sometimes be funny wag lang may toyo and funny guys will rule the earth!! Dont be so seryoso and dont tell her your sad stories unless plano mo umutang or you need a big favor and stop the pagtatapat ng feelings BS kaya ka mababasted , kasi nagtatapat ka In short , keep her guessing , who gives a @#$% what she thinks sorry cant think of anything else for for now Pahinga muna ako , sumasakit arthritis ko Dolphy, Erap and Allegra. What do they have in common? They make fun of themselves. They are down to earth inspite of what they have become. Girls love them! So work on humor. Try to find the lighter side of things. Don't worry if you sound corny trying hard at first. It doesn't come overnight. Confidence will come when you reach Allegra and Enzo's age. ;D No need to rush it. Life is about the experiences, the good and the bad. Enjoy both. Fail and fail again? Keep trying and keep taking notes. just wanna share this to you... i know someone who have different problem naman... <snipped> why don't you try to comfort this girl? maybe you two will be a perfect partner... ahihihi!!! ;D
Wow! Dr. Mhelai is in the house! Ayan, maybe you like to invite Mhelai's friend to a friendly blind date. Be a gentleman. Be yourself. Dr. Mhelai can act as chaperon and observe how you work on your dating skills. There you have it, Wonder Boy! A real-life-self-project. Dating is cheaper than enrolling in AIM! (or buying all the books of Dr. Margarita "Margie" Holmes!) Btw, dating is more fun too! P.S. If you need a male chaperon, you know who to call... [whisper] Allegra! [whisper]
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Post by allegra on Jul 17, 2007 1:49:55 GMT 8
nyahaha gadgets , I almost exhaled my coffee thru my nose sa sinulat mo Ayoko kay Erap , George estregan was my idol No , females have never liked me unfortunately and I have peklats from celfones being bashed on my head to prove it I'm a behavioral scientist and I always use psychology to my advantage Say something profound , it will be assumed na marunong ka kahit dehins Here's a not so profound profoundness - The real players are like the real tough guys. Those who are , do not talk about it Since I keep talking , then i'm not! As usual , I'm just trying to be funny for the other members of PinoyMTBiker ewan ko lang kung natatawa sila or naiinis but both are fine by me besides eversince naman , stick to two lang ako hahaha definitely joking Gotta watch out for those f#$%^n' flying nokias!
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Post by wcoastbo on Jul 17, 2007 7:20:42 GMT 8
Nice first date gadgets.
I also like to keep first dates simple. Yup, I was always on a budget while in college. Even after college when I already had a job I still kept my first dates simple. Not because I'm cheap, but because I didn't want to give the impression that I was trying to buy her affection. Besides, emotional or mental flattery is much more effective than flattery by spending. Nothing worst than a date that likes your money more than she likes you.
One of my favorite first dates is "the picnic". I had several locations scouted out... quiet but not too secluded, a shaded area overlooking the ocean with a cool breeze, a short walk from the car with a grassy area. I packed a blanket, bottle of wine, some fruit, other snacks and a small meal. One time I even bought a women's magazine that had some kind of compatibility survey, Cosmo, I think. It was good for some laughs between us.
If the date went well during the day, it usually turned into a night date with dinner. If the date flopped, I still had the evening to meet up with my buddies.
Sorry, back on topic... see my next post.
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Post by wcoastbo on Jul 17, 2007 7:23:48 GMT 8
I gotta say that this thread is very entertaining, yet informative.
allegra - you're too funny! stop it, my sides are hurting from laughing too much.
wandie - correct me if i'm wrong, but you're having a hard time reading this particular girl's signals? you can't tell if she likes you for the same reasons you like her? and it's not the first time a girl did not have the same feelings as you did towards her? you feel like you're getting mixed signals?
I have also gone through relationships where I didn't know where I stood. I use the term "relationship" in a generic way because it can be defined anywhere from a few casual conversations to a long-term monogamous commitment. Not knowing where you stand is not always a bad thing, but you could set yourself up for heart ache if you invested a lot of emotional energy and it doesn't get reciprocated. Maybe you should be more pragmatic about your relationships with the women you meet and less emotional. The emotional and idealistic part can come later when you both want the same thing in a relationship and have put the practical part behind you.
I've been on both sides of the equation. One girlfriend wanted to get very serious, but I was only 19 and I knew we were both very young and emotionally immature. Besides, she had issues and I was not willing to carry her baggage. On the opposite side, I was going out with a girl and I couldn't really tell if she wanted to take the relationship to the next level. We had a conversation about becoming more serious, but she was conflicted about doing so. "Conflicted" is not a yes, so I quit pursuing but kept the relationship at a "friends" level. I've also had many platonic female friends. Some where we were not physically attracted to each other, or she was not attracted to me, or I was not attracted to her. You have to be good at all types of relationships or you won't be good at any.
Here's my general rule about mixed signals (BTW I always have exceptions to my rules and rules are made to be broken)... if you can't tell your affections are being reciprocated, then she doesn't like you. What if... 1) she's too shy to say she also likes me, but she really does? if that's the case, we wouldn't work out in the long run. I prefer my partner to be more expressive and passionate rather than passive. 2) she really does like me, but she's pretending not to. I don't play those kinds of games and we wouldn't work out in the long run. Besides, there would be other personality clashes to deal with if she likes to play those kind of games. 3) she is not attracted to me. I'm ok with that. That's life, not everyone will be compatible with me or I with them.
If I get one or two perceived bad signals, do I quit pursuing? Not at all. Especially if I think the potential is there. But you gotta know when to move on. Remember, there's not "the one", it's about the relationship you build with a particular person. There could be dozens or hundreds of potentially compatible women for you, but you gotta build the relationship it won't happen spontaneously.
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Post by whoopi on Jul 17, 2007 9:47:21 GMT 8
BO = Dr. Phil. seriously. very sensible.
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Post by Alphabolt on Jul 17, 2007 10:54:49 GMT 8
My take: first I'd like to thank Edgar/enzo for the vote of confidence ( I really need to find an excuse to go there and nibble some caviar...heheheh) 2nd, I 'd like to advise Wandie to relax + breathe + agree + listen + look deep into their eyes after 2 hrs of being together...girl or boy depends on your preference which I respect Be honest about everything except your major insecurities...they dont need to know that yet Make the date more comfortable than revealing at first then grow into each other...and explore if mutually desired Game on!
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Post by kulot_salot on Jul 17, 2007 11:11:36 GMT 8
2nd, I 'd like to advise Wandie to relax + breathe + agree + listen + look deep into their eyes after 2 hrs of being together...girl or boy depends on your preference which I respect hehehehe.... say it ala- CSI's gil grissom: "i don't judge people..." ;D ;D ;D ...and explore if mutually desired ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D this i LIKE!!!!
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Post by g.b.b on Jul 17, 2007 11:53:58 GMT 8
i really cant relate in this thread.....
to the thread starter..........you shouldv'e joined me in my college days.........
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Post by kulot_salot on Jul 17, 2007 14:57:14 GMT 8
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Post by wcoastbo on Jul 18, 2007 0:40:51 GMT 8
haha! Thanks Roche, but I can only wish to have a small bit of Dr. Phil's knowledge. I only wanted to interject the obvious... some common sense. It's good to put it into one's mind for those emotional times when it could be used. When our emotions are taking over we all tend to make rash decisions. Hopefully we can recall some of the common sense we've put into our brains when the time is necessary.
Actually, I prefer humor to sensibility. Unfortunately, the only person who thinks I'm funny is myself ;D
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Post by yukon on Jul 18, 2007 5:25:52 GMT 8
where's wandie? has he been reading all these wonderful tips? i hope you putting it into practice or else...sayang. Hope to hear from you and learn what tips were successful ;D
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Post by wcoastbo on Jul 18, 2007 23:54:49 GMT 8
"you can lead a horse to water, but..."
I'm thinking our responses were not exactly what he was looking for, so it was time to get a drink from another place. Good effort by all.
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